I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
I woke up thinking it was Friday. I was disappointed (to say the least). I am pretty sure I have gained the quarantine fifteen (but I won’t know until I try to put something other than elastic-waisted shorts on). And I am probably going to need dentures because I am grinding my teeth so much. But hey--this is temporary, right?
Randomize
