Porn is love you can see.
Is your liver wearing a sombrero yet?
No...more like a life jacket.
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
If anyone could figure out how to pee on someone's soul, it would be you.
You always know what to say to make me feel better.
You are the alcoholic guardian angel of raccoons
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
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