I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
dear vagina, thank you for making it so goddamn hard to get pregnant. i love you.
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pretty sure a homeless guy just told me to 'lick his balls clean' because I looked at him.
I feel like he knows I had a dream about him eating me out in the janitors closet at the holiday party. He's giving me THAT look.
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
Randomize