they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
She was so drunk that I kept trying to switch out her wine for water. Sort of like Jesus, but in reverse.
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
I know of an excellent nanny. A lot like Mary Poppins but way cooler. And likes pot.
I ditched my one night stand in the hotel lobby. How did he add me on Snapchat?
Randomize
