My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
I'm getting turned down for sex. Apparently my "sexual appetite" cannot be satiated even by a man who's such a deviant he went to prison for jerking off in his car.
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
Randomize
