you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
You're married and I'm going to make out with a stranger tonight. Isn't that weird? It's like a gap in the time space continium.
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
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