If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
When my alarm went off, he rolled over and asked me: Bacon or dick? Yes, I will see him again.
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
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