Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
I woke up hugging my purse and I found a business card in my underwear. How?
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
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