I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
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