Drunk x Brooklyn = problems getting home. If I don't make it you can have my computer and my bitches. You're welcome.
with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
I knew you were drunk when you poured scotch on a croissant and ate it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
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