your thong is hanging out like whoa
Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
Just saw my boss eat a banana in three bites.
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
I have sent texts to the pizza delivery guy telling him he was beautiful. Oh and you almost got a ticket for pissing in public. And I smell like cheese.
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
Randomize