White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
I don't know if it's the amount i drank last night or the number of taylor swift statuses on facebook but i feel like puking everywhere
I think I told some stripper my friend owned Groupon Last night
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
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