I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
This bar receipt from last night makes no sense
You were wasted and got mad that it was too high so you subtracted 50 bucks in the tip line from the total
I wish that would've worked
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
What kind of friend would I be if I didn't make you hate things you once loved?
Randomize
