I was 10 minutes late leaving for lunch today because I couldn't lose a boner. It is impossible to tuck it when your shirt is tucked in...gotta quit facebook stalking hot chicks at work
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
I accidentally gave my prayer card to the bouncer. Clearly a cry for help #saveme
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
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