Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
your like the ambassador to my penis.
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
My tub is filled with twinkies which would be awesome if they were still wrapped and not floating in a mixture of bath water and what appears to be vomit.
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
Randomize
