I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
I love that my idea of a romantic gesture to you is to send you a picture of my vomit saying "wish you were here". You voluntarily dated me. For six years ish.
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
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