Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
I woke up in a house cuddled up with a beagle on a futon. have no idea who anyone is but they all call me stretch. yeaaahhh boiiiiii
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
Emoji's do wonders when you actually have nothing at all to say..
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
New low: eating a buttered roll while taking a shit.
This is why we're soulmates.
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
Randomize
