The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
Packed at 6 am completely wasted. Damage assessment: 12 pairs of socks (no underwear), a flashlight, 3 shorts, shot glass, 8 sweaters, puff paint, one sneaker.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
I came over to his house for a party and realized I was quoted on the fridge... "How'd I get rug burn on my face?" And yes, my name was right next to it!
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
You went outside, peed in the front yard, and asked me to bring you some toilet paper.
Randomize
