I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't even have to sign up for karaoke at duncans anymore. The karaoke ppl just sign me up themselves. Without my consent. I also sang stacys mom to some lady named Stacy who's mom died yesterday.
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
This is your liver's 7:15 wake up call. Mandatory margarita popsicles after work today. Rule #71: no excuses, play like a champ!
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
After getting kicked out of the bar, you proceeded to McDonald's, ordered 30 nuggets, slammed them all back in 5 minutes and then stole 3 traffic cones...how you only got charged with drunk in public is beyond me.
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
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