Dual....:-)
dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
I was in the bathroom throwing up...when I walked out he was sitting there watching porn and jacking off. He said, "Sounded like you were gonna be in there for a while."
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
Left my card at the bar and had a drunk girl climb on the hood of my running car to scream at me.
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
but dude how did I get so drunk?
Pretty sure it happened right after you poured a shot of Wild Turkey into your Budweiser, chugged it, and screamed "I. NEVER. BACK. DOWN!"
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
Randomize
