What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
How does, "Im sorry I was such an intoxicated bitch, I didn't mean anything I said" sound as an apology.
Just found out that I was singing john legend songs as I threw up last night. Quality.
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
Found her with a stray dog now called champagne, crying about how she feels a mom now. Had to take her home. The dog too.
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
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