I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
Randomize
