Thank you for leaving pool of vagina on my girlfriends carpet.
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
Randomize
