Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
Im sorry for drunkenly throwing your phone into the ocean. At the time it seemed like a good way for you not to text him
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him.
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
Just did. I played that shit out so casual I deserve an Oscar. Or am Emmy, or whatever the fuck you get for acting like a boss
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
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