what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
found a ham sandwich in the elevator it tasted so hungry and it was still fresh. dont be mad at me. you know you love ham.
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
I realised my life had gone downhill since being unemployed when I was making key lime pie on acid at 3am Tuesday morning.
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
Hey, dude, is Kevin still passed out on your porch?
Yeah. I'm gonna go leave a pitcher of bloody mary next to him in case he's still alive.
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
Randomize
