i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
May the power of my ass compel you!!
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
Randomize
