the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
So I called her out for all the gossip she does and she's like "you do the same, bitch"
So I was like "Im classy like the Countess, youre just a bitch like Kim."
Kudos on the Interstate Housewife metaphor.
You were so drunk that you were trying to take pictures of a MILF at the park so you could send them to Adam, but you didn't want to "seem creepy," so you used taking pictures of her son as a cover. Needless to say, cops were called.
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
cat food counts as protein by the way
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
Been in bed for 16 hours. Haven't eaten in 18 hours. Haven't pissed in almost 20 hours. Fuck you Stacey and your former reign as laziest bitch. I got the title now.
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
Randomize
