3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
u ever jackoff with ur legs spread and pretend ur fuckin urself as a girl and get mad u'll never know what that feels like. Or to fly like a bird?
Did u absorb a fraternal twin in the womb?
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
My bed is full of blood and feathers
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
If we had kids we couldn't come home, get high and watch porn together. And that's like the only reason I get up in the morning
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
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