He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
I have eleven tally marks and an infinity sign drawn on my wrist in permanent marker. Senior bar crawl stole my liver.
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Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
Get everyone into the kitchen. I need you all to witness me friend-zoning him. Just in case.
You wouldnt be able to explain the can of green beans in my mailbox, would you?
It was my penance. God came down to me in the form of an angel and said, "you must atone for your sins, by puking in your mouth at church right before communion"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Although a guy bought me a shot of fireball last wknd and I told him he wouldn't even get half a handjob for that and walked away so don't tell me I don't have standards
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
So he cheated on his gf again. For the third time. Second time with me. HE CRIED WHILE DRIVING ME HOME BECAUSE HE CHEATED ON HER. And I laughed the entire way. Good god I'm an asshole.
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
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