So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
Dude, can't find my socks anywhere....
Yeah, you took a shit in the harbor off a wall, used them to wipe. I'm sure they're still on the beach somewhere if you really want them back
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
Randomize
