I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
Your drunk self managed to not pee on anyone's bed
Go me
I'm actually proud
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
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