Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
You told me you were going to invite all of your Tinder matches to the same bar on the same night and make them compete for your affection in a series of Lust Olympics. Winner gets laid.
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
Randomize
