You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
My makeup looks extraordinary for nine tequila shots, running four blocks, falling asleep with my face in the toilet, and doing the walk of shame across campus in the rain. And to think I'm single.
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
My friends son got stung by a jellyfish over the weekend and we seriously stood there debating on whether or not we should pee on this toddler.
I met a pornstar at his bachelor party and signed his shirt giving him wedding advice
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
So I just accidentally joined a bar crawl and got a free shotski of Jameson. I love life.
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