so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
I don't judge her for getting booty calls at 2 in the morning, so she can't judge me for staying in friday nights and putting spray cheese on pringles.
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
Randomize
