But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
Drinking non-alcoholic beer is like going down on your cousin.
Sure it tastes the same, but it ain't right.
my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
can you come get me and bring me shorts and a shirt
maybe shoes and water too
oh and maybe a noose to hang myself
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
we came into the house to find you doing shots by your self and when we told you to stop you locked yourself in the bathroom...
did I at least say anything...
you meowed at us and said you're a cat and cats drink for a living
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
I just want to dump glitter on my floor and roll in it like a cat in catnip.
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
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