Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
I just woke up wearing the O-ring from my dildo harness as a bracelet. Classy.
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
Randomize
