Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
Randomize
