Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
Randomize
