thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
He brought me hungover chipotle knowing full well he wasn't getting a blow job. I think he may be too in love with me.
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
Do you have feelings for this penis?
This can only be settled by a dance off.
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
Randomize
