we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
I just threw up over a bridge. I didn't even know there was a bridge in this town. Vodka is like a transportation device.
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
I need to sanitize my soul.
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
Randomize
