i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So my birthday was awesome. Only remember 45 min of it but I woke up with a girl on the couch and a half bowl of ground beef
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
Rolled over in bed this morning and found Nutella and wet naps. Why can't it ever be a fire fighter, or Jude Law.
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
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