maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
That one life defining moment when you catch yourself pouring whisky into your hot chocolate at 4 am, whilst crying and talking to your dog.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
You took your shirt off at the bar, handed it to a girl, and made her wash your dirty shirt on your washboard abs
tuesdays get the best of me...
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
Randomize
