He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
I broke up with him in the bar & then asked him if he wanted to have a contest to see who gets the most numbers. I say I took that break up well
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
Randomize
