Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
Liz is crying about burritos again.
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
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