South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
I feel like the devil is trying to impregnate me through my eyeballs.
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
An "unreasonable amount of ejaculate" isn't a reason to be angry at me.
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
Randomize
