Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
I threw a jar of pickles out the window at a police car, why was that not a good enough reason to put me to bed?
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
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