Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
He left me alone in a hotel room my last night in town to go home to jerk off and watch TV. So yeah, I guess we're not really friends.
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
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