i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
Someone just walked into the bar with a pillow
I don't know whether to judge him or give him a high five
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
Randomize
