whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
I may wear a condom to jerk-off tomorrow knowing that my hand has touched surfaces in this bar.
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
I just heard myself say the sentence "I'm gonna go to the bank then take a nap". 8 year old me just slapped my present self through the space-time continuum for being an old fuck.
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
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