I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
the "happy anniversary" cake for my mom and dad is about to turn into the "yeah, that's a hickey, welcome back from italy" cake.
he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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